In my house, we watch football. Some of us (um, me) don't actually watch football. What we do is suffer through the background noise of it all the time. All. Weekend. Long. During football season (one-fourth of the year!) all the other things I could be listening to...music, raindrops, the dryer...are all obliterated by that droning noise coming from the TV.
I don't blame my husband for driving me slowly insane. It's not his fault. He was indoctrinated by his father, and his father before him, and his father before him. This is the male way....I get it. Besides, I really do love the guy. And even though our rabbi never mentioned televised sports during our wedding ceremony, I'm sure there was some implied acquiescence about it thrown in somewhere. Probably in the Hebrew I didn't understand.
For my husband's sake, I wish I could be one of those "football fan" women. You know, the ones who sit by their hubby's sides and scream along with them. Sadly for him, no. He ended up with a woman who only likes hockey and baseball. I suppose I have other redeeming qualities that make me lovable to a man who reads football statistics for pleasure.
There IS a glimmer of hope for him in his house of women-folk, though. Catie rather enjoys throwing balls around, and Jaden not only knows what football is, but has become quite curious about it.
Since her father hadn't done so yet, I took it upon myself today to explain the rules of the game to my tw0-year-old daughter...
"Okay, Jaden. See all these guys here? They all have yellow pants. That means they're friends and they play together. Those guys? They have blue pants. They're friends together too, but not with the yellow guys.
The blue guys and the yellow guys don't want to be NICE friends, they just want to jump all over each other and take the ball away. See the brown ball there? It's called a football, but mostly they hold it with their hands. Everybody wants to get the ball, and knock it onto the ground. That's why they jump all over each other.
They wear a hard hat so they don't get too hurt. You can ONLY jump on your friends if they're wearing a hat to protect themselves! Sometimes that man in the zebra clothes has to come in and give them a time-out because they didn't follow the jump around rules."
It would seem that there ARE a few life lessons to be learned from football. Such as, stick with your friends and you'll be okay. And, taking toys away from somebody might get you put in a time-out.
I'll save the intricacies of scoring for another day. In the meantime, I will try to make it through this season without accidentally-on-purpose knocking our TV off the shelf. After all, if I did that, however would I torture my husband with home design shows and Hallmark tear-jerkers?
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Just Some Woman I Know
I have this friend. She's a really good friend of mine, actually. We like a lot of the same things. We've grown both apart and together over the years, but even when we're not in synch...I know that she's always there for me.
Whenever I feel low or discouraged, I can always count on her to say the right thing. She tells me the things nobody else does. She encourages me to be a better person. She doesn't sugar coat it, either. When I need some real advice or straight talk...she delivers.
I really dig who she is, and over the years, I've come to love her for this amazing woman she's grown into. She's not afraid to try new things. She can do just about anything she puts her mind to. She's smart, and caring, and brave, and honest.
She talks to just about anyone. It's the most bizarre thing. She'll strike up a conversation with random strangers about anything at all. She likes to call those 800 manager lines on her drive-thru receipts and tell them what a wonderful job their teenaged employees are doing. I asked why she's always chatting up people she doesn't know, and she couldn't say why. Personally, I think she just likes the human race.
She is pretty well-liked herself, I think. She's one of those people who really goes out of her way to be kind, generous, and helpful. A long time ago she decided that Robert Fulghum had the right idea, and she began performing random acts of kindness. I admit, even I laughed about that. Didn't stop her though.
For all that, she really is an introverted kind of a person. You might not realize this about her unless you know her very well, because she tends to hide things. She grew up slightly different from most people you might know. Not the roughest of childhoods, but hers certainly did leave it's imprint. She told me once that, regardless of how she may seem, inside she will always be that scared, shy, poor little new girl at school. She doesn't have a lot of friends that are intimately close. Well, besides me.
We don't see each other as much anymore. Every once in awhile she'll pop in for a visit, or we'll go to a concert, or something. But with work stress and life in general, it's getting more and more rare.
I know she misses me too. This morning I was thinking about her as I brushed my teeth, so I leaned in toward the mirror, peered into my hazel eyes, squinted them slightly, and yeah...she's still there. She smiled right at me and asked me to go do lunch.
You know what? I think that's a great idea.
Whenever I feel low or discouraged, I can always count on her to say the right thing. She tells me the things nobody else does. She encourages me to be a better person. She doesn't sugar coat it, either. When I need some real advice or straight talk...she delivers.
I really dig who she is, and over the years, I've come to love her for this amazing woman she's grown into. She's not afraid to try new things. She can do just about anything she puts her mind to. She's smart, and caring, and brave, and honest.
She talks to just about anyone. It's the most bizarre thing. She'll strike up a conversation with random strangers about anything at all. She likes to call those 800 manager lines on her drive-thru receipts and tell them what a wonderful job their teenaged employees are doing. I asked why she's always chatting up people she doesn't know, and she couldn't say why. Personally, I think she just likes the human race.
She is pretty well-liked herself, I think. She's one of those people who really goes out of her way to be kind, generous, and helpful. A long time ago she decided that Robert Fulghum had the right idea, and she began performing random acts of kindness. I admit, even I laughed about that. Didn't stop her though.
For all that, she really is an introverted kind of a person. You might not realize this about her unless you know her very well, because she tends to hide things. She grew up slightly different from most people you might know. Not the roughest of childhoods, but hers certainly did leave it's imprint. She told me once that, regardless of how she may seem, inside she will always be that scared, shy, poor little new girl at school. She doesn't have a lot of friends that are intimately close. Well, besides me.
We don't see each other as much anymore. Every once in awhile she'll pop in for a visit, or we'll go to a concert, or something. But with work stress and life in general, it's getting more and more rare.
I know she misses me too. This morning I was thinking about her as I brushed my teeth, so I leaned in toward the mirror, peered into my hazel eyes, squinted them slightly, and yeah...she's still there. She smiled right at me and asked me to go do lunch.
You know what? I think that's a great idea.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Happy Birthday, Christian!
Happy 19th birthday to my one and only son :) May this year bring you self-satisfaction, peace of mind, and daily happiness. You deserve it. I love you!!!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
"Everyone Else Is Smarter Than Me"
I love sticky notes...I put them everywhere. I like to write little phrases and quotes and random facts down and place them around my workspaces.
This week one of my stickies caught the eye of a friend and she read it aloud;
Well, yes I do.
Here's the thing. I have a very low-ability class this year. And in this class, one student in particular has, to put it bluntly, been driving me bugshit. She's sullen. She refuses to work. She finds ways to be quietly defiant every hour. Just when I think I've got those kiddos right where I want them, I glance over at her and realize she doesn't give a crap what I say or do.
It's extremely difficult to deal with kids like that. More than the average layperson would understand. And I admit, my reaction to her attitude would not have won any Teacher of the Year awards, that's for sure. I mostly felt pissed off that I had to put up with her, and was planning to call her parents in for a little chat about her attitude and behavior.
Then a few weeks into the year I was administering a big test, and I went to check on her, thinking I'd probably find her off task or staring into space, as usual. I briskly told her, "Come on now, back to work!" and was about to pass her by when I happened to notice tears rolling down her cheeks as she hid behind her testing folder.
Figuring she was probably angling for a bathroom or nurse pass to get out of having to test, I went and put my arm around her, and bent down to ask her what was wrong? She just looked at me for the longest time, as if she were trying to figure me out. Finally, she whispered quietly, "I can't read it. Everyone else is smarter than me. I'm too stupid to do it."
Wow. Just...wow. What was I supposed to say to that? For the record, I don't believe it's true. Half of my class reads at her level. But she believes it. She BELIEVES it.
I began to wonder...What has happened to this little 8-year-old girl day after day after day to convince her that, not only is she stupid, but she is the stupidest person in her world? In just 3 years, we as an educational community have broken this child. And how can I, a teacher who has only known her for a month, even hope to change this?
What I DO know is that attitude is contagious, and self-fulfilling prophecies are no joke. We will achieve only what we believe we can. Kids cannot see themselves clearly. They see themselves not as who they really ARE, but who they believe others think they are. They need parents and teachers who are willing to believe in them, so they can begin to believe in themselves.
As a teacher, that's my mission. To find any sincere opportunity to praise this student. To make sure she experiences success. To fight back against the attitude, and return sullen frowns with encouraging smiles. To remember that, for all her eye-rolling and heavy sighing, inside she is really just a little girl who has never had a reason to believe she can be anything but stupid.
So that's why I wrote that rather cryptic sticky note and placed it where I would see it often. It's a reminder to me that every person I meet has their own secret thoughts and beliefs about themselves. That there could be more to a person's eye roll or heavy sigh than just a "bad attitude". That we all struggle every day to swim against currents of our own negative thoughts, and you just never know when someone will need a hand to clasp.
You just never know if that hand might be yours.
This week one of my stickies caught the eye of a friend and she read it aloud;
"Everyone else is smarter than me."
What was that all about? she asked. Why would I want to read a note like that every day? Don't I know that "negative self-talk can become a self-fulfilling prophecy?"Well, yes I do.
Here's the thing. I have a very low-ability class this year. And in this class, one student in particular has, to put it bluntly, been driving me bugshit. She's sullen. She refuses to work. She finds ways to be quietly defiant every hour. Just when I think I've got those kiddos right where I want them, I glance over at her and realize she doesn't give a crap what I say or do.
It's extremely difficult to deal with kids like that. More than the average layperson would understand. And I admit, my reaction to her attitude would not have won any Teacher of the Year awards, that's for sure. I mostly felt pissed off that I had to put up with her, and was planning to call her parents in for a little chat about her attitude and behavior.
Then a few weeks into the year I was administering a big test, and I went to check on her, thinking I'd probably find her off task or staring into space, as usual. I briskly told her, "Come on now, back to work!" and was about to pass her by when I happened to notice tears rolling down her cheeks as she hid behind her testing folder.
Figuring she was probably angling for a bathroom or nurse pass to get out of having to test, I went and put my arm around her, and bent down to ask her what was wrong? She just looked at me for the longest time, as if she were trying to figure me out. Finally, she whispered quietly, "I can't read it. Everyone else is smarter than me. I'm too stupid to do it."
Wow. Just...wow. What was I supposed to say to that? For the record, I don't believe it's true. Half of my class reads at her level. But she believes it. She BELIEVES it.
I began to wonder...What has happened to this little 8-year-old girl day after day after day to convince her that, not only is she stupid, but she is the stupidest person in her world? In just 3 years, we as an educational community have broken this child. And how can I, a teacher who has only known her for a month, even hope to change this?
What I DO know is that attitude is contagious, and self-fulfilling prophecies are no joke. We will achieve only what we believe we can. Kids cannot see themselves clearly. They see themselves not as who they really ARE, but who they believe others think they are. They need parents and teachers who are willing to believe in them, so they can begin to believe in themselves.
As a teacher, that's my mission. To find any sincere opportunity to praise this student. To make sure she experiences success. To fight back against the attitude, and return sullen frowns with encouraging smiles. To remember that, for all her eye-rolling and heavy sighing, inside she is really just a little girl who has never had a reason to believe she can be anything but stupid.
So that's why I wrote that rather cryptic sticky note and placed it where I would see it often. It's a reminder to me that every person I meet has their own secret thoughts and beliefs about themselves. That there could be more to a person's eye roll or heavy sigh than just a "bad attitude". That we all struggle every day to swim against currents of our own negative thoughts, and you just never know when someone will need a hand to clasp.
You just never know if that hand might be yours.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Sleeping Girls
I went to check on the girls and found them like this. Even in sleep, Catie mimics her sister.
My heart is so full.
My heart is so full.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
We All Have the Laps
"Children are made readers on the laps of their parents."
Emilie Buchwald
This quote gives me chills whenever I read it. If I could tell every new parent just one thing that I've learned, one thing that I know to be true...this would be it.
Read. Just read...everything, everyday. Build a huge library of books and make reading the most special thing you do together. Cuddle close and read, read, read. Don't save it for bedtime, don't wait for a magic age, and don't stop when your child goes off to school.
It's the secret. A secret I wish I could confide, but since I don't see parents when their children are still this young, that continues to be my wish. Sadly, by the time I'm in the picture, that window has closed. And for all that I do, and how much I dedicate myself to the teaching of reading, I will never be able to give kids what their parents might have long before me.
Can you imagine how smart, how inquisitive, and how verbal this next generation of our children would be if every parent read to their toddlers and preschoolers every single day? Just think about it for a minute. It's such a monumental challenge, and yet...wouldn't it be so easy? The books are all around us. We have the desire. We have the time. And we all have the laps.
Just think how amazing the world could be 20 years from now if we put them to better use.
Emilie Buchwald
This quote gives me chills whenever I read it. If I could tell every new parent just one thing that I've learned, one thing that I know to be true...this would be it.
Read. Just read...everything, everyday. Build a huge library of books and make reading the most special thing you do together. Cuddle close and read, read, read. Don't save it for bedtime, don't wait for a magic age, and don't stop when your child goes off to school.
It's the secret. A secret I wish I could confide, but since I don't see parents when their children are still this young, that continues to be my wish. Sadly, by the time I'm in the picture, that window has closed. And for all that I do, and how much I dedicate myself to the teaching of reading, I will never be able to give kids what their parents might have long before me.
Can you imagine how smart, how inquisitive, and how verbal this next generation of our children would be if every parent read to their toddlers and preschoolers every single day? Just think about it for a minute. It's such a monumental challenge, and yet...wouldn't it be so easy? The books are all around us. We have the desire. We have the time. And we all have the laps.
Just think how amazing the world could be 20 years from now if we put them to better use.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Happy Birthday, Kharli!
I can't believe I've had the pleasure of knowing you for an entire 21 years! You are the best thing that ever happened to me....don't forget it. I love you!
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