Happy Holidays!

We had a really whirlwind holiday season this winter.  I was so, SO busy that I never took the time to
blog about it.  I regret that now because this is going to be a looooong post!  Just scroll through to the things that interest you :)

Jen and Billy came again for Thanksgiving, and we all enjoyed their visit!

Jaden greets Aunt Jen...

Caitlyn was shy for awhile, but she had a big sister to comfort her...

When she warmed up, Caitlyn had fun playing with Uncle Billy.  I think he knows her game...

Craig and I with the girls.  Yes, that's a purloined cat toy in Catie's hand...

Jaden loves taking pictures...

I was disappointed that Kharli had to work on Thanksgiving and Christian went to his grandparents' house.  It doesn't feel right when they're not around, but I know they're growing up and that happens.  I hope as they get older and start their own families that we will all be able to meet in one place instead of having to choose.
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Hanukkah came early this year...it kind of snuck up on us, so we missed lighting the menorah for like, 4 nights.  That's okay, I guess, since we don't know the prayers anyway.  But even as a shiksa I really enjoy the menorah, so I swear I'm going to make up my own prayers!  I will make them really good ones too.  Like, "We light this candle to honor those who give selflessly to others throughout the year." 

On the eighth night of Hanukkah...

 

Jaden and Caitlyn fully participated in decorating the tree this year, at least they think they did.  Kharli and I had to go move all of Catie's ornaments when she wasn't looking because she put all 10 of them on the same branch.  Their favorite thing to do every evening when we came home from school was to turn on the tree and sit near it.  Each day without fail Caitlyn exclaims, "Yook!  It's a twismas twee!!"

Reading by tree light...

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My sisters and I took all of our kids to the studio to have portraits done as a Christmas surprise for my parents.  It was no small undertaking.   It was quite an ordeal to coordinate, and I had a hard time dealing with a terribly shy Caitlyn, but overall it turned out to be kind of fun!  It was funny, because I think the teens are all getting old enough to be embarrassed by the family ruckus (which THEY cause, by the way) and I am getting old enough to not worry about it anymore. Shoe's on the other foot, Kids...hahaha.  They were great that day, and we got some nice portraits.

 The whole bunch...

Can't get them to be serious for anything...

Caitlyn's not in that shot because she was busy doing this...

 My four...

 

Number 1 and Number 2

 Number 3

Little Number 4.  The best she'd do.

 Cousins and friends...

 So pretty...

Afterward, they all went outside to the courtyard and hammed it up.  I like these even more!

 

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One Saturday Craig took Jaden to see a Willy Wonka gingerbread house, complete with chocolate river.  Jaden was amazed, and she got to see some Oompa Loompas too!

 

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One thing this year that I really enjoyed was our staff Christmas Party for the kids.  We had a potluck, games, crafts and treats, and a book gift for each child.  Jaden and Caitlyn had a really, really good time.  I hope we do it again in years to come.

Hanging out waiting for the festivities...

Musical "dots"...

Painting picture frames.  Yes, my kids are wearing trash bags!

Sugar cookie decorating...

Another Bear book...

Up past bedtime...

 

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At their school, the girls were in the annual Christmas show.  It was performed in the chapel, which was weird for Craig, but he held up nicely with minimal eye-brow raising at the "Jesus is Lord" posters.  But then, I drank manischewitz at our wedding.  A little tit-for-tat makes the world go 'round, right?

This year the theme was Noah's Ark.  Jaden was a kitty cat, Caitlyn was a monkey, and I thought those choices were VERY appropriate.   We couldn't believe it when Caitlyn's teacher actually got her to go up on that stage and sing with the crowd.  Amazing.  She made it almost all the way through her group's song.

Here are a couple of videos.  They manage to capture the chaos of this event quite well.  Watch, but stand warned: I'm NOT the greatest videographer, especially when Caitlyn was pulling on my arm during Jaden's song.

Jaden singing "Away in a Manger" and "Michael, Row the Boat Ashore"...

Caitlyn singing"This Little Light of Mine"

Well, sort of singing.  She'd kind of had enough of the spotlight by then...

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On Christmas eve we went to Jacque's house for dinner.  I got to be in charge of appetizers this year and it was the most fun I've had cooking in years.  Forget turkeys and pie...I only want to make apps from now on.  Anyway...as usual it was loud, and people ran around, and people got silly.  Some cried, some laughed, some yelled.  All in all, a successful family gathering!

I love my family.  My nieces and nephews are all getting so big...it's nice to see how time and circumstance are shaping them into real human beings.   Sometimes I get so busy caring for the little girls and keeping them from breaking things and each other that I never quite get to enjoy my family as much as I'd like.  So if any of you are reading this...I love you!

Happy Holidays to everyone!  

Watch for the Disneyland post and the yearly slideshow :)

Filling the Hole

This time of year always makes me wonder about people. Everywhere I go people are shopping.  Partying.  Eating.  Joining in on all kinds of Christmas cheer.  The social networks are all abuzz with glad tidings of one kind or another.  All my favorite bloggers are wrist-deep in writing about their wonderful holiday activities.

And me?  Well, this year my holiday spirit seems to be eluding me.  You would think that my Christmas apathy would indicate a depression or something.  But I'm not depressed...far from it.  I'm as content and joyful as I usually am.  I feel happy pretty much every day.

So, why is it that while I once adored Christmas-time, now I can only muster a half-hearted "eh, whatever"?   It's not that I don't like Christmas...I do.  It's not that I'm broke and can't afford to partake of the mass commercialism around me...I could.  It's just that, I don't really feel like it.

Going shopping and buying gifts just doesn't satisfy me the way it once did.  It doesn't fill me up inside with gladness.  It's become a chore I fulfill so that others don't worry about me.  I mean, can't you just hear it?  "Dawn's boycotting Christmas...Christmas!  Can you believe it? What's wrong with her?  Is she okay?"

Lately I've been wondering if people in general use the holiday season to fill something inside themselves that needs filling.  Some emptiness of the soul that only they can name.  Maybe it's a simple desire for love, or family time, or food.  Maybe it's a more complex need to compensate for secret feelings of inadequacy.  

I see people all around me who appear to use gift-giving as a way to declare their own value.  As in...I love you the most, therefore I buy you more.  Or...I work very hard, therefore my family deserves all this.   I think everybody has a hole of some kind to fill within themselves, and some people are so desperate to fill it that they just keep buying things.

For me, when I do have those feelings of an emptiness in my soul, it usually comes from lack of time and energy.  I want to give more of that to my family.  So I fill that hole inside myself whenever play with or read to my little girls, or go to the movies with Kharli, or discuss the intricacies of life with Christian, or chat with Craig in the after bedtime quiet. 

When I started paying attention to my feelings this season, I noticed that I was very blah about shopping and buying things.  I walk past it all without even a tiny spark of desire, and that part of it just left me feeling emptier than before.  I was even worried about myself a little. 

Then I realized all the things that have made me very happy in the last month involved people and events.  I loved visiting with my husband's family during Thanksgiving.  I loved seeing my girls singing their little holiday songs on stage.  I loved going with my sisters to photograph our huge clan as a surprise for our parents.  I loved taking my girls to our Christmas party at work.  Those things satisfied me in a way that gift-giving isn't doing anymore.

Next year I'm going to try something new.  I'm only going to give experiences, or give you something that cost me more time and energy than money.  So maybe we will go to the ballet together, or the movies, or the roller derby.  Maybe I will make you some cookies, or a beaded necklace, or a photo calendar.  Just remember, it's not me being grinchy.  It's me filling my hole. 

And maybe, just maybe, if I give you something of more value to me, I will fill your hole too.

This is Why..

This is why I LOVE being a teacher.   Friday morning just before Winter break...it's foggy and drizzling against our windowpanes, but we are happy and warm inside.  My kids are laying on the floor in their PJs and slippers, watching the Polar Express and drinking peppermint cocoa with whipped cream.

It doesn't get any better than this.  I have the best job in the world!

Happy 4th Birthday, Jaden!

I can't believe she's already four years old.  I feel like every time I blink she gets a little bit older, taller, smarter, prettier.   I love this girl SO much!

On the day she turned four, Jaden loved...

singing in the car at the top of her lungs

dressing head-to-toe in fluffy princess things

having deep conversations about the "whys" of life

narrating our highway rides home

snuggling in our bed in the mornings

bossing around and tattling on her littlest sister

loving and hugging her family

eating fruit with every meal

lying her pants off about the smallest things

taking flying leaps off the sofa arms

sassing her mommy

telling anyone who will listen how much she loves them

I'm so grateful to have had another year of my Jaden!

It's a Great Day to Be a Princess

Kharli, Jaden and I had a girls afternoon out today and went to see Tangled. 

Jaden loved it!   She spent the last 15 minutes praying for them to get married.   I thought it was really cute, and yes...I cried.  Shut up.