Thursday, April 22, 2010

Closing My Eyes

I have always thought I was an easy going person. I don't get overly flustered with things as they are. I roll.

Now, those living in my household may disagree with this statement, probably calling to mind the many times they stood in my way when I got fed up with clutter and went on a non-stop cleaning spree.

But, usually...I roll.

I'm not big on judging others.  I'm friendly to everyone. I accept people for who they are and genuinely like them.  If someone acts a certain way not to my liking, I cut them some slack because surely there's a good reason. 

If you were to ask me, I'd say that most people are compassionate and kind.  Most people want the best for others the way that I do.  Most people care about the same things I do because, well...why shouldn't they?

Actually, that's what I'd have said last year.  This year, after nearly four decades on this planet, I am starting to wonder.  This year has opened my eyes.

It just seems that everywhere I turn I come face to face with yet another example of people who seem broken, empty of all that humanity I've always attributed to them.  People who don't really care.

Have I become someone who expects too much, only to be disappointed when others don't quite live up to her expectations?  Or has it always been this way, and I am just now learning what the world is like?

I read somewhere that Anais Nin once said we don't see things as they are, we see things as WE are.  I have always believed that most people are good, and true, and decent.  I'd like to think that I see those qualities in others because I possess them myself, and that's my perspective.

But what does it say about me that I've begun to doubt my fellow humans? I think I need to turn off the TV, and stay away from the internet.  I don't want to see the ugliness that is really there.  I need to close my eyes for a little while.


Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Drafts

No, this isn't about sports!

I was looking through my blog and noticed that my list of posts I've drafted is pretty long.  Lately I start writing something and have to go work on something else before I get finished, so I just save it as a draft.  This has been going on for about 3 months.

In one of my favorite books, "All I Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten", Robert Fulghum ends his book with a list of stories he wished he'd have time to write, but never got to.  I love that idea, so here's my list:

Next time you come here, I promise to tell you all about the dotdotdot, baby chicks, my biggest regret, baboon lovin', the toddler blues, four years, the bathroom personality test, my favorite commercial, and the time the bed was on fire when I lay down on it...

Okay, that last one wasn't for real.