So I went to the grocery store today. Biggo shopping, the kind where I go around and ask everyone what they want me to pick up. Kharli used to live for big shopping day. I ask Craig what he wants and he says, "Uhhhh....I dunno". I ask Christian and he says, "Uhh...(insert one strange food item here)". I would ask Kharli and she'd either rattle off a list or just take over the pen herself.
Shopping day is different now. I walk up and down the aisles and see all the things Kharli used to ask for. Arizona iced tea. Starbucks frappaccinos. Peanut butter Ritz bits. Dreyers slow churned ice-cream. Chips and green onion dip. Instant oatmeal. Dr. Pepper in cans. I see all these items and my arm sometimes reaches out to grab one, then I remember and I put it back.
I know it's not like my child is GONE. But my child is gone. She's out there, waking up in a different house, walking into a different kitchen and making some instant oatmeal that my hand didn't place in a shopping cart for her.
I bought an Arizona iced tea today. I don't know why. I don't even like it.
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